Philadelphia “Celebrates” “Soccer” “Draft”

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Chester, or the “Cradle of Soccer” as the Phoenicians called it, will host the MLS’s newest franchise The Philadelphia Union.

Union narrowly edged out Arson and Crumbling Educational System in a voter poll.

According to this article, the Union’s first MLS draft thrilled fans.

With the first pick in the draft, the Union selected Danny Mwanga.

Welcome to Philadelphia Danny, I look forward to following your career with the same enthusiasm I hold for professional poker and local triathlons.

These guys

Philadelphia residents beware, zombie soccer fans are running rampant, trying to make you care about soccer!

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