Posts Tagged ‘Stephen A. Smith’

Stephen A. Manufactures Racism

June 11, 2010

Stephen A. continues to tarnish his legacy (?) of being an inoffensive, slightly amusing blowhard with his latest column.

Here’s a quick synopsis: The Washington Nationals’ first overall pick and uber prospect Bryce Harper, his parents, and white athletes get a free pass when they decide to bypass college to become a professional athlete. Black athletes like Lebron, Kobe, and Kevin Garnett are vilified for doing the same.

I definitely remember the time white Americans rioted when Kobe Bryant entered the draft out of high school. What a black eye/definitely racist moment in our nation’s history.

(more…)

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Stephen A. Smith Is A Miserable Person

June 3, 2010

Stephen A. Smith hates Philadelphia.  No, he really does.  In a Sartre-esque twist, writing about Philadelphia sports for the Philadelphia Inquirer is the only work Stephen A. Smith can get.

Hell is being forced to write about the Sixers and Eagles.

Smith’s latest phoned in column accuses Philadelphia of hating Kobe Bryant.

Do we hate Kobe?

Of course we do.  If you didn’t notice, he’s kind of an enormous dick.

Stephen A. continues to chum the water by making statements like:

You would think with such lofty credentials there would be a statue standing somewhere, on some street corner, perhaps near City Hall, paying homage to Kobe Bryant – the greatest champion to ever come out of a place known for its associations with anything but.

OK?  Make sure to put it next to the statue of Kevin Eubanks.

More  Stephen A. Logic:

Those same folks would rather point to the fact that Bryant was raised in Italy during his formative years instead of recalling that he was born in Philadelphia. They’d rather question his street credibility because he starred in the suburbs of Lower Merion than appreciate how his game transcended the streets.

Screw Kobe and the fact that he didn’t live in the greater Philadelphia area for all of his formative years!  He cannot call himself a true Pennsylvanian!
I do question Bryant’s street credibility constantly.  I only respect basketball players who were homeless and literally raised by an inner city street.   And can you believe he’s never been shot with a gun?  Some kind of basketballer he is!
So we boo Kobe Bryant, who cares?  Sorry we can’t all be such stalwarts of appreciation and sportsmanship, Stephen.
We don’t like losing championships.  Especially to dicks like Kobe.
We also like our hearts and would rather not have them cut out.




Stephen A. Smith Yell-Writes Again

March 25, 2010

I opened the internet papers (or I-papes) this morning to see if there were any updates on the rumored McNabb trade and found the latest Stephen A. diatribe.   If you don’t want to damage your eyes/ears by reading it, Stephen thinks the Eagles treatment of McNabb has been “disgraceful.”

Smith says, “It’s fine that the Eagles are contemplating moving on. But McNabb’s failures are connected at the hip with Reid’s. They were supposed to be in this together. But the way the Eagles have conducted this process lacks so much sensitivity, it’s offensive to hear Reid say, “We’re evaluating things,” as if Reid shouldn’t evaluate himself.

Of course Reid should evaluate himself and his well documented deficiencies but after receiving a contract extension, Reid ain’t going to fire himself.  Per Smith, Reid and McNabb should The Hours-style Virginia Woolf themselves together (translation: put large rocks in their pockets and sink into a river, preferably while not knowing how much time is left in a game).

The irony of the situation is the Eagles may have shot themselves in the foot by overvaluing all their quarterbacks, including McNabb.

But not according to Smith:

Instead, they are considering throwing McNabb and his 32,873 career passing yards out like trash.

Word has it Reid is  going to throw over 30,000 yards of twine into a garbage can to symbolize McNabb’s failure. 

McNabb has not been perfect, to be sure. Too many throws have been too low, too high or too hard. He hasn’t always come through under pressure. But there’s something to be said for getting the Eagles in position, for keeping them relevant, for being class personified along the way.

So Smith admits McNabb’s flaws but demands the Eagles not trade him because he’s won several “relevant” and “classy guy” awards for the organization.  McNabb by all accounts seems like a decent human and there’s no grave dancing here if he’s traded but he’s had over ten years to accomplish something he didn’t.

It’s unconscionable, classless, weak – and too ridiculous for McNabb to deal with any longer.

It is indeed unconscionable to trade a quarterback in the NFL, it’s literally never happened before.   McNabb should be quarterback for life.  His good guy-ness should allow him to start until he chooses to retire or dies, Supreme Court style.

Stephen A. Smith Collects Another Paycheck

February 11, 2010

If you didn’t read the internet papers today, you may have missed Stephen A. Smith’s latest oeuvre.

Stephen’s argument boils down to:

For:

He also offers this bulletproof argument:

McNabb, for all his flaws, is still one of the best quarterbacks in the game. He’s still a playmaker, someone opposing defenses have to plan to stop. Let Celek say what he will about Kolb’s potential. But talk to me once Kolb becomes a No. 1 option someday.

Maybe I’ll care.

Bam!

Stephen doesn’t need to substantiate anything.  There’s also no reason for him to shed any light on what exactly McNabb’s flaws are.  The burning question remains, exactly what would make Stephen A. Smith care?

If you ask, I’m sure Stephen A. would yell the answer at you.